The Painbender’s Manifesto
Channeling Chronic Pain Can Change Our Lives
Chronic pain is a pervasive drain on human potential, ability, and joy. It takes lives that are full of promise and ruptures the whole landscape. Chronic pain patients lose their lives as they know them and, as they are buffeted about by pain and societal complications, they largely become victims of circumstance. But there is another path forward, one widely unspoken and unknown, undefined and yet innate in all individuals suffering from chronic pain’s dominion.
The crux of this shift rests in one’s own sense of identity: the quiet cognitive process of self-identification, set by habits of self-talk, connection or disconnection. Life with chronic pain is defined as a passive experience. Individuals living with chronic pain are widely known as ‘chronic pain patients’–a term that implies victimhood and a medicalized life–one is never far from some form of doctor’s office, therapy or pharmacy. This whole definition and self-conception shifts one’s life from an active endeavor to a passive suffering, and this definition consumes and blots out other ways of identifying oneself. Enough with the self-pity, we know in our heart of hearts that it’s gotten us nowhere. It’s time to take action and to to move our pain ourselves. And we can start simply with breathing meditation.
Painbending is the practice of doing what must be done to manage, mitigate, channel, and transform chronic pain. This practice is personal, practical, existential–searching for one’s full potential, and seeking one’s own best practices for dealing with their own pain and the issues it brings along: physical, psychological, social, vocational and spiritual. I believe that the practice of painbending has existed for centuries already, although in different forms and under different names. Painbending can manifest in different ways, from a Christian painbender seeking solace in God, to a Buddhist painbender using mindfulness and meditation, to a rationalist painbender who approaches their pain with scientific method, neuroscience and psychology.
One of the major pivots in painbending is the way in which we think of ourselves, of our sense of personal identity. In the beginning of The Matrix, Neo has a conception of himself as Thomas Anderson, an outcast office worker, incapable of being a warrior, or an agent of change, let alone a savior. Yet he eventually casts off this self-limitation to embrace his spiritual power as The One–as Neo. When we are up to our necks in chronic pain, we have a very heavy sense of self-image, with lots of internalized views, values and feelings. We conceive of ourselves as broken; as irreparable; as perennial patients; as victims of life and circumstance. These views consolidate from loops of self-talk and rumination, and feed into further negative and limiting self-talk. Painbending is changing our view of our pain as a heavy burden, into a perspective seeing our pain as immense energy that can be contained, tapped, transformed, and transcended. It’s shifting our thinking from the mode of I CAN’T to I CAN. It’s recognizing our own power and the potential to channel our raw somatic energies into something with purpose. Ultimately, it’s shifting our sense of self from being merely a chronic pain patient, a victim, a cripple… into being a badass spiritual warrior with the power to move, morph and go beyond chronic pain as we know it. Your life circumstances are what they are; yet your destiny is yours to shape.
What does this look like in practice? The beginning starts with mindfulness. Chronic pain cycles flow between the physical and mental. Feelings of stress can set off a pain. A pain can set off dark thoughts. We start off by simply doing our best to watch our thoughts, observing the interplay between mind and body, seeing what our patterns are. We don’t want to change everything all at once, especially without the benefit of seeing ourselves clearly. We can meditate, journal, talk with close friends or counselors, make drawings or diagrams, simply expressing what’s happening within–and most importantly, taking the time to step back and look at what we have going on. We can then start to make tiny habit changes. Working off the biopsychosocial model of pain, we can look at creating new, healthy patterns with our physical health; our mental health; and our social engagement. Believe it or not, feeling alienated socially can influence our pain levels. Maybe try going for a small walk every other day for the body; maybe try meditating 10 minutes a day for the mind; and maybe try reaching out to an old friend or family member for interaction. Work from a place of self-love, confidence in your capability, and a firm sense of I CAN.
The genesis of painbending initially came when I was determined to no longer lie back and take my pain as it hit me. I was determined to build a philosophy and practice for pain management and self-improvement in body, mind, and society. What I’ve uncovered is a result of study in spirituality and science, philosophy and faith– even media, such as Avatar: the Last Airbender, from which the form and name of this art is derived. It is pulled from a fantasy world where the four main earth elements are channeled for all sorts of purposes, from good to evil to funny. Watching the benders derive new forms of elemental control, such as firebenders creating lightning, or earthbenders creating metal-bending, it suddenly struck me that pain is felt much like an element–and learning to channel the element of pain can inject a new sense of agency, efficacy, power and purpose.
Since the beginning of the pandemic, I have been writing a book on painbending. It started out as a personal project, but I now plan to publish it when it’s done, because I really think this revolution in mindset can help a lot of people. The first half is a collection of essays on how to begin painbending and approaching different issues; the second half is a compendium of useful meditations, the results of my work teaching meditation for chronic pain with EvolVR. I will publish some of the draft material here to get the word out, such as the mountain meditation post shared previously.
Even though I’m writing the book on painbending, it’s important to note that a) I don’t have all the answers for living with chronic pain, as I still struggle with it on a regular basis; and b) painbending is personal, unique and differs on a person-by-person basis. The main aim of this manifesto is to share the powerful practice of painbending, as well as the transformative self-conception of being a badass painbender rather than an indignant victim, a chronic pain patient, or an aggrieved cripple. You have power within you, and it rests with shifting away from the surrender of I CAN’T and toward confidence in our capabilities.
What works for us is a process of discovery, experimentation, and self-discipline–stepping out beyond the thrall of chronic pain and following a vision of a better, happier life. Being able to put pain in its place can be a huge confidence boost. And putting it in its own lane helps us create space for our passions, our hobbies, our love, our curiosity, and our purpose in life. I hope that you found something helpful in this manifesto, and that people with chronic pain all over the world find the redemption they seek as spiritual warriors, as channelers of somatic energy–as brave painbenders.
Addendum: Recommended Media
- Avatar: the Last Airbender (TV Show)
- The Matrix (Film)
- Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life,
by Martin Seligman, PhD (Book)